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January 9th, 2007 
QuadsZilla By now you must have seen a few Apple reviews that are so gushing that they almost cross the line to pornographic:
Are these reviewers so taken by the beauty and power of the machine that the reviews have to read like a trashy novel? What’s the deal?
I never quite understood how sexy the Mac Book Pro could be until Iarrived here in Rio De Janeiro. After finding an Open Wi-Fi Connection in my hotel room I set up my home-office and left for a night on the town.
Sure enough, when we returned from our night out, that hot and sexy Aluminum case was waiting to give us the Full Apple Experience.
Wasting no time, she beckoned us to Key Stroke and stroke and stroke. This Mac Book Pro Was Both incredibly FAST and EASY. It got me thinking, what could be better than Core2Duo?
2Core2Duo2!!!!!
2 Mac Book Pro Core 2 Duos – Now I am the Quad-Father! muhahahahahaha
Next, it was time to plug in the Special “Mac Lover” USB Microphone with harmonious cosmic hum. Intel’s not the only thing inside of these sensuous beauties.
Apple showed me how easily these two machines could interface as we heard what can only be described as a multiple Dual Corgasm:
The ecstasy didn’t stop there. These sexy beasts wanted to boast their performance, connectivity, and Serviceability. They screamed for a bigger, Harder 500 GB Drive and would not settle for anything less than 30 Inches of LDC Love:
This orgy of performance and connectivity has certainly turned me into a Mac lover. I can honestly say that, now, I do indeed “Think Different”.
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o – m – g … i hope the lingerie isn’t from your personal collection. The Nikes hats complete the picture. Sweetness
Wow, that’s sexy, Are they gonna pop out an iPhone and a few 100GB iPods in 9 months?
Amazing.. Next time try to get the Mac porn on film!
Haha, cheese alert. Funny though
Could be a tough day to get the link love though, what with the Mac Expo and the iPhone.
Or do you think that will work in your favour?
This puerile and offensive post objectifies and de-Macifies defenseless Mac Book Pros. Grow up and get a clue, jerk!
Seriously, this ranks in the hall of shame as a canonical example of extraordinarily stupid humor as link-bait.
Nice work, Quadz. I think I’ll definitely renew that subscription to seoblackhatforums since the blog of late has become dorkyland.com.
[...] Ok. You have GOT to go take a look at these photos of the “Super Sexy Mac book Pros“. I don’t want to publish the photos here, because they are WAY too hot for this blog. [...]