Archive for the ‘Blogs’ Category

Google Properties to Appear #1 in all SERPs

“We’re a search engine . . . no wait we’re a portal . . . and Gootube!”

It’s scary: Google can decide at any time to steal the top spot for itself . . . like it did for finance, travel and most recently for movie searches:

Stolen SERPS

“Sorry IMDB but we’d rather just have all those top spots for ourselves. 2nd is not that bad though.”

Will it stop? I doubt it. Google’s going to take the top spots on every vertical they want.

I’m not so sure I welcome our new Robot Overlords anymore.

I Just Got a Linux Car!

Last week I got fed up with having to make car payments. Cars should be free! Then someone told me about this thing they have called the linux car . . .

The great thing about the linux car is that it’s free and it never gets flat tires. I’m all about saving money and I love free. While everyone else pays huge companies for their car, or taking the bus (which sucks!) I got a car without spending a dime.

The first bad news came when I tried to actually get in the car and drive; I received an error message on the dashboard that said, “No tires detected.”


I knew I saw tires when I got into the car. So I got out and checked, and sure enough there were tires on the car. So I got back in and banged on the steering wheel a few times before deciding to check the manual.

After a few hours of poring over the manual I discovered that I had to tell the car about what kind of tires I had.

So, after some digging, I found the button to initiate tire declarations (for some reason it was called INI RUBBER-BASED ROAD INTERFACE LIB EZ). I pushed it and a little sign lit up saying, “If your Linux car is a 2006 model or better you may need to install a rubber-based road interface synchronizer before attempting to declare tire status to the vehicle.”

I went to the hardware store and bought one, but it was the wrong size so I had to go back again. The instructions were in German but I still managed to get in installed. I pushed the button and went on with my tire type declarations, after which the car finally decided to recognize my tires.

Great!- now where’s the gear-shift?

After hours of searching I gave up and called up a friend who’s a real car expert. He chuckled. “Dude, only idiots use gear-shifts. Linux drivers use gear modulating paddles located on the sides of the driverseat. Don’t you know anything about cars? Jeez.”

I made fun of him for being a virgin and then returned to my car. Indeed, the gear modulation paddles were conveniently hidden under the edges of my seat.

I decided to take the car for a spin, so I pulled out of my driveway and the car stalled. A message on the dashboard said, “Before initializing for road driving, please specify your exact model of Linux car.”

It then gave me a list of four hundred vehicle types, each with just a slight difference in model number. I was eventually obliged to take apart a substantial part of the engine in order to see the little model number on the side of the block. Satisfied, I inputted this number into the dashboard once I’d put the engine back together and started off on my first Sunday drive with my brand new Linux car.

After going to the supermarket, which my linux car did more faster and more securely than any car i’ve been in, I decided to drive to the football game. When I got within 3 miles of the stadium, the car started to shake, stalled out and said “Football games cannot be visited in this car.”

So I checked the manual and, sure enough, the linux car will not go within 3 miles of any baseball, football basketball or hockey game . . . but you can take it to a lawn dart tournament or to compatible bowling alleys. Sigh . . . well that sucks.

Finally, when I found out my car wasn’t compatible with my iPod I put the damn thing up on cinderblocks in my front yard and decided to just take the bus.

The bus sucks, true, but you know what? It’s a no-brainer.

I put the reddit button up cuz this is a reddit type of post. Problem is, I don’t think many of you use reddit yet. Give it a try if you haven’t – there’s some great stuff on there, it’s way faster than Digg, and you’ll see a different set of what’s popular on the web.

This little bit of geek humor is because of Pubcon/ light SEO news and a /. comment – hat tip to cheesburger brown. The comment was open source – right?

Elite Retreat – For Real this Time

In this post we’ll go over my relationship with other SEO bloggers and take a serious look at the Elite Retreat.


Well, I got tons of IMs about my Pink Hat SEO post last week: people wanting to know if I have some kind of gripe with Shoe or Aaron or Lee Dodd. One blog commenter even asked if “frosts [my] ass to see them make this kind of money?”

No. I’m not that type of person.

Getting upset or jealous because someone else is making money is negative energy that should be removed from your life. Business is not a zero sum game. If someone else is making money, that doesn’t mean that there’s any less money for you to make. If someone else is successful, I look to see what they are doing right and emulate it.

Here’s my take on the elite retreat:

For the right audience, $5,000 is a bargain. While the presentations about PPC, Blogging, SEO and community will probably be useful in and of themselves, the real benefit here is going to be from the interaction.

The “Strategy Session” and “Group Discussions” will allow attendees to get inside the minds of how successful online entrepreneurs think. More than anything, thinking the right way and learning innovative ways to tackle various projects are the keys to success. Many . . . I would say MOST . . . people in the corporate world do not have their heads around what it takes to create a successful online business. That’s where the interaction with people who are successful can make the biggest difference.

Even starting to learn something like that is easily worth the 5 grand.

When you read the fine print of the elite retreat, that’s when things get juicy. See where it says “Action Plan Follow-Up”? That means to me that attendees are going to be able to fire off quick questions to the speakers for a couple months to come. Getting high level input on strategy from people who have done it is one of the real benefits that I’m sure many have overlooked.

How do I know this is such a benefit? Because two of the speakers are already in my Instant Messenger. While I don’t chat all that much with Aaron, Shoemoney has given me advice that has helped me make literally tens of thousands more dollars. It cuts both ways, though, one of the things I showed him . . . something that took him about 20 mins to change . . . is now making him an extra $14k per month.

If you don’t have the contacts it’s hard to get the attention of the right people. The elite retreat is a step in the right direction for people who need to build connections.

Do I have a gripe with any of the Speakers? Of course not. The Pink Hat SEO post was a harmless joke. Most people thought it was funny – including Shoemoney and Aaron.

The real URL for the elite retreat is

.info? They must be spammers. 😉

Got .gov?

As you may know, cetain .gov sites have a ton of weight in the SERPs. They are trusted because . . . well <sarcasm>shouldn’t we trust everything the government does?</sarcasm>

If you are familar with parasite hosting, you know that getting access to a premium domain can yeild some incredible returns very quickly.

What if I told you you could get access to a 10 year old plus .gov domain with over 3 million backlinks? What if the backlinks included over 80k .edu and .gov links?

What if I told you that you could get a mini site on said .gov domain that is NOT orphaned (ie it has a link from within the site going to the mini site)?

Would you be interested?

Well you’re not alone.

Right now someone is auctioning off just that type of access and the bidding is up to just around $10,000. Since one could make that back in a day with the right type of spamming, I expect that price to go considerably higher before the auction closes.

If you’re a serious spammer, this is one opportunity you may want to take a look at.

Check out the details of the .gov Parasitic hosting auction here on eBay.

Pink Hat SEO

When I first heard that Shoemoney, Aaron wall and Lee Dodd were putting on an “Elite Retreat” for $5000, I thought that while it will be a great opportunity for some people, I don’t need to go. After all, I already make good money on the Net and have a great network of contacts. I thought “what can i really learn?”

But today I got an email that talked about one of the benefits:

VIP – For an additional fee you can attend an intimate business dinner meeting with all four leaders for an additional $500.00. Dinner will be included except alcohol. Max number of attendees is 5. This is on a first come first serve limited basis . . .

Interesting. What did they mean by “intimate business dinner?” And with who?

So I decided to go to the elite retreat website to get some more details:

Holy shit was I surprised. This isn’t going to be a waste of money!

This is not going to be some stuffy conference where you don’t really get to know people. This is taking networking to the next level. This is absolutely revolutionary!

I was surprised to see the Portuguese references. But after living in Brazil this last year, I’ve become rather fluent. That will apparently come in rather handy.

If you haven’t checked out the site today, you have to go to see it. I hear this is not the same schedule that was originally announced.

Is that shoemoney in the pic? If it is, dude not only lost weight but now he’s shredded!

Am I worried about my $5000 investment? Not one bit.

This is going to be FUN. It’s clear that even an expert like me can learn a ton from going to a convention like this!

There’s only one thing I don’t understand: Why is Andrea coming?

Is Your Blog “Fucking Cool!”?

What’s new with your blog?

The fact is, Prince has always been a marketing genius as well as a musical prodigy. He knew to juke when everyone else was jiving; zig when the crowd was zagging.
Here’s the man himself on his early approach:

Times were different back then,” Prince explains. “I wouldn’t stand out today if I was brand-new and came like that. But see, back then nobody else was doing that, and I knew that would get me over. I didn’t dress like anybody, I didn’t look like anybody, I didn’t sound like anybody. We still try to do that. Why do what everybody else is doing?

“Bowie and Madonna, even if it wasn’t good, we still talk about it because it was something new. That’s a beautiful word.”

What’s new with your blog?

Is it “Fucking cool!”?

But that got me thinking – what does “passion” boil down to? Where do you begin? Kathy and Dan have many more eloquent and well constructed thoughts on this on this, so I figured I would bring it down a notch on the maturity level, away from any hint of intellectual discourse towards a raw, gut feeling:

“F**king cool!”

That’s where passion begins. Those are the words I want every user of my product to utter. Ideally followed up by something like:

“Dude, you have to check this out. It’s so f**king cool!”

I don’t want their reaction to be a measured, rational, dispassionate analysis of why the product is better than the alternatives, how the cost is more reasonable, feature set more complete, UI more AJAXified. I don’t want them to pause to analyze the boring feature comparison chart on the back of the box.

I want “f**king cool!” Period.

There are now 100,000 new blogs coming online every day. If you want to be successful, your blog better be “f**king cool!”

Most aren’t. That’s why:

“Most blogs have precisely one reader – the blogger themself” – Google CEO Eric Schmidt

Fun With Amazon Feedback

After last weeks thread, the 250 best movies of the last 30 years, I decided to order some movies from the amazon marketplace. That’s where people sell used DVDs on Amazon.

So far I’ve had to communicate 3 times with the sellers. Here were two of the emails I had to send:


I just wanted to let you know that I love Braveheart. It’s a great movie. One of my favorites. I love the part where he’s rallying the troops on the battle field and says “What would you give for just one chance, just one chance! To tell your enemy that while they may take our lives, they will never take . . . our FREEEEDOM!”

That part is classic.

But when I ordered Dawn of the Dead from you, I wasn’t looking for Braveheart in a Dawn of the Dead Box.

I would much prefer to have, I don’t know, Dawn of the Dead. Being as how that’s what I ordered and all.

How would you like to proceed to fix this?


and another:


I just wanted to let you know that although used, the box for “Friends like Harry” is beautiful. I really enjoyed the box a lot. They did a great job on it. But I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind sending along the DVD to go with it at some point? Normally when I buy DVDs they send the box and the DVD at the same time. I think that makes more sense, but if you guys prefer to do it the other way, who am i to judge?

What’s the ETA on Delivery of the DVD?


So far 3 problems out of 18. Maybe the used DVD business ain’t all it’s cracked up to be . . .

Google’s Marketing 2100 Times Better Than Microsoft’s

While trolling digg this morning, I noticed that Google made the front page because of a $30,000 donation to creative commons. Now, don’t get me wrong, if someone in the SEO community were to give $30k to Creative Commons or any charity – that might be link worthy: maybe even Digg worthy.

But why is it news that a company that made $800,000,000 in profits last quarter gave $30k to charity? What is Google putting in the freaking Koolaid to make this a news worthy event? If they weren’t there already, this surely signifies that Google has reached cult status and is now a religion rather than just a company.

“I’d like to start a religion. That’s where the money is!” L. Ron Hubbard, Scientology Cult Founder. 1947.

Compare that paltry donation to what Microsoft did in October. Microsoft had a giving campaign during last month, October, where it matched employee donations, and in one month they raised $63 million dollars. That’s what a one month campaign resulted in. 58% of the employees at MS contributed and MS added $1 for each $1 the employees gave.

Imagine how many people were helped by Microsoft’s Giving last month. Contrast that with how many people will be helped by Google’s Giving. We don’t even need to start on the personal giving of Gates this year – that would put things in an even sillier perspective (if that’s even possible!)

$63 Million dollars vs $30,000. The $30k makes the front page of Digg. The $63M – well at least it went to a good cause.

$63,000,000 / $30,000

So IF This story makes the front page of Digg, Google’s Marketing is 2100 times better than Microsoft’s.

Of course we don’t expect that to happen. For Digg, and much of the blogosphere, Google = God and Microsoft = “teh Bad”. Here’s the button – You can try, but I doubt it will make a bit of difference:

The most Interesting Piece on the GooTube Merger . . . Ever!

Cuban has a freaking awesome post from a supposed insider on the the GooTube Merger that includes this incredible highlight.

The second request was to pile some lawsuits on competitors to slow them down and lock in Youtube’s position. As Google looked at it they bought a 6 month exclusive on widespread video copyright infringement. Universal obliged and sued two capable Youtube clones Bolt and Grouper. This has several effects. First, it puts enormous pressure on all the other video sites to clamp down on the laissez-faire content posting that is prevalent. If Google is agreeing to remove unauthorized content they want the rest of the industry doing the same thing. Secondly it shuts off the flow of venture capital investments into video firms. Without capital these firms can’t build the data centers and pay for the bandwidth required for these upside down businesses.

Indeed, less than a week after the Google Youtube buyout, we saw Universal start to sue Youtube competitors. So the story definately has some weight!

It also talks about how the recording labels figured out a way to fuck the artists out of any of the royalty moneys related to the settlements:

The media companies had their typical challenges. Specifically, how to get money from Youtube without being required to give any to the talent (musicians and actors)? If monies were received as part of a license to Youtube then they would contractually obligated to share a substantial portion of the proceeds with others. For example most record label contracts call for artists to get 50% of all license deals. It was decided the media companies would receive an equity position as an investor in Youtube which Google would buy from them. This shelters all the up front monies from any royalty demands by allowing them to classify it as gains from an investment position. A few savvy agents might complain about receiving nothing and get a token amount, but most will be unaware of what transpired.

Google accomidated all of this.

Don’t be evil . . . MY ASS!

This would absolutely be front page of slashdot if it were Microsoft instead of google. Will we see something resembling balance from slashdot, digg or the rest of the blogosphere on this issue?

Let’s wait and see. . .

Halloween Link Bait Roundup

Hollidays are a special time of the year. Special, because they are another time to write targeted link bait. Geeky + holiday theme = links. Here’s a roundup of some stuff that hit it big for halloween:

Digg Halloween Costume

Ha.ckers Halloween pumpkin cutting contest

Halloween Laptop Mod

Girls’s Costume Warehouse

Working Transformer Costume

Do it yourself list for Halloween

HOWTO: Lego Minifig costume

How to Geekify Your Halloween

Will you be ready for thanksgiving with some kick ass link bait?

You should be.